Vidushi Gupta : The SoulHome

Almost every answer I read here talks about the same thing: ‘Men cheat on their wives because there isn't sufficient sex.’ But as an Indian woman, talking about most Indian men, somewhere I think it is disrespectful to say that men only remain faithful and satisfied in marriage when there is lots of sex. To say that sex is probably the only thing which keeps men hooked to their wives and not go looking for another woman, is somehow misandrist and same like saying that women only remain loyal to their husbands when he makes a lot of money and gives her lots of gifts, which is again hugely misogynistic. Emotional needs of a man: I am very surprised about why no man has written about the emotional needs of a man which often the wives fail to fulfill, or the lack of general compatibility and understanding between them. Cheating has several reasons behind itself, sex, though one of the major reason, isn't the only reason. A man wants respect, support, appreciation and trust f

When I was in school, I was friends with a girl who had ‘ entitlement syndrome’. Every time I did anything for her, like help her in her projects, pick her up/ drop her off for and after school, or lend her my stuff, in return of sweet smile or ‘thank you' she used to just brush it off. I used to feel bad, but I did not say anything. After all she was my good friend. Maybe she just lacked a basic courtesy, but she was good in some parts too. One day I just asked her casually why she never acknowledges the stuff I do for her. Her reply was simple- ‘ Why should I? We are friends and you're supposed to do these things for me. What’s so special about them?’ I was a little shocked. Yes, I felt bad. Was I ‘supposed' to do things for her because we were friends. Was I under any sort of obligation? But I always did things for her from my heart. She was someone I truly cared for, someone I wanted to help when she needed it. I never felt that I was ‘supposed’ to do those things.

People grow; sometimes they grow more in love, sometimes they grow out of it.’ Growing up in opposite directions of perspectives can very easily make two people fall out of love. It is pretty amusing when people say, “Opposites attract”. Maybe they do attract, maybe the college heartthrob will fall in love with the shy backbencher girl. But for how long? Does every couple who is too drastic in personality will enjoy a lifetime of togetherness? No. Opposites might attract and bring people closer. But it is the similarities which keep them together in the long run. It's not about the similarities of hobbies or interests, but the similar direction and perspection regarding life. I had a friend in 2011. She and I were best of friends at that time. We used to understand each other, laugh a lot, had fun, share our sorrows. Our interests were different and we had lots of stuff to discuss. Even after all our differences, we still understood each other and shared a deep bond. But in

Dear men and women, kindly don't make your marriage the victim of ‘equality syndrome’. Now before you start criticizing me left and right, read the article completely. A marriage isn't supposed to be equal in the ways we want but that doesn't make it unequal. For Women: As a girl, I know you and I expect our husband to be supportive of our dreams, and would want him to take up half of the household chores and other family responsibilities of family and children. I know how unfair it is when we work for the same hours but somehow magically it is us who always do the 80% of the house hold work. We might come around at the same time from office, he relaxes while we toil in the kitchen. Seems misogynistic? Right? Well, before making opinions, how about a thought about the financial management of the house? For example, in most cases, who earns and puts in more money in the Indian house? The man or the woman? And let's talk about an average Indian household. Most fi

The year 2009 : I had a crush on a classmate. Figured out one of our common interest was reading. Started discussing books and stories with him. Those lovely chats about the characters and plots. Ahh, the good old days! Who came to my rescue? The books ❤️ The Year 2012 I had my first heartbreak. I used to cry for hours listening to sad songs. I used to dislike everything. I was lonely and depressed. There was no one with whom I could have shared my sorrows without being laughed at. So I just turned to books. I read them. I read many of them. Lost in the fantasy and fictional worlds, feeling the warmth of emotions in my heart and a smile on my lips, I recovered in a couple of years. Who came to my rescue? The books ❤️ I desired to be a writer and author. But I did not know how to write, forget about writing a whole book of 50000 words. And there wasn't anyone in my circle who was into writing to whom I can turn to for guidance. Then I again turned to books. Read a few b

A debt free life. The society is forcing young people to submerge their lives in loans. My parents have been married for 40+ years and have three kids. We have our own home, not a mansion but yes a normal sized home and one normal car. We have a comfortable life. Not lavish. Sweet, simple and comfortable life. But in all their life my parents only once took a bank loan of INR 5 Lakhs for the marriage of my eldest sister 15 years back when they both were in early fifties and repaid it quickly too. Their complete young age was loan free. They both had jobs, they both earned, they both saved. They lived in rented houses for 20 years after their marriage. They travelled on Bajaj scooter, rickshaw, auto and on buses. They build their own home in around five years little by little and then kept on modifying it even years after moving. They weren't too interested in having dinners in 5 stars, or going around the city in a big beautiful car. They weren't a fan of branded clothes,