Love Me Back !!
"I am nothing special,of this I am sure.I am a common man with common thoughts and I've led a common life.There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten,but I've loved another with all my heart and soul,and to me,this has always been enough."
When 'Noah Calhoun' from 'The Notebook' quoted these words,he meant he was content in loving someone.He clearly excluded Allie's love from his 'enough'. And when he quoted these words,we all wondered,whether as readers or the movie audience for a second that how can he still love and miss Allie,whom he hasn't met in fourteen years,neither has he heard from her even after 365 letters,and most of all,whom he had seen with someone else.(He saw Allie and Lon in the city,remember ?)
Even though Noah and Allie were very much in love once,and even though Allie still thinks about Noah,she is clearly depicted to be in love with Lon and is happy marrying him,until she has a reunion with Noah.Noah,on the other hand is shown to be in love with her all through his life,searching her in every women he has dated,and therefore never marrying any of them.
Unrequited love is a phenomenon too common all around the world.And if there exist some other worlds,I am sure it is common in there too.You meet someone,have a small crush on them,and sometimes fall for them too.But that's not it.The real thing starts when you hope them to fall for you too. And when that doesn't happen,you rant and complain about love.Isn't it ? But isn't it also ironical when we fail to reciprocate someone's love when they love us,and never rant about it.When it's about our love,we want to be understood and reciprocated,but when it is someone else's,we ignore to understand and reciprocate.
'Gone with the wind', a 1939 classic,shows the different angles of unrequited love.Scarlett O' Hara, keeps on waiting and risking her every relation for Ashley Hikes,and thus never reciprocates her husband's Rhett Buttler's true love.But the day she realizes it,Rhett leaves her by saying "My dear,I don't give a damn." This dialogue symbolically indicates that no matter how strong unrequited love is,over time,and continuous futile attempts,gets frustrated and eventually dies.It shows that how a person who is waiting for someone,is also making someone wait.
Unrequited love is as much love as reciprocated love.You feel for them,and expect them to feel for you too.And just like it,it is painful too,but with more intensity.Unrequited love,like reciprocated love,doesn't validate and entertain your expectations or rights on the other person;means you're not entitled to expect or question.You cannot expect them to love you back,or tell you where were they,or with whom they had spent the day with.You cannot expect them to not to fall for someone else or stay with you forever.Your unrequited love is like your dream,personal and private,and when you try to force your dream on someone else,you're being selfish,because you deny to accept that they can have their own dreams,which probably doesn't include you.And accepting this,sometimes leads to dangerous consequences.
'Raanjhanaa' a 2013 movie,depicts how unrequited love becomes an obsession and leads to fatal and tragic ends.Dhanush acts as an obsessive lover,'Kundan' who fails to accept and move on even after knowing that his lady love 'Zoya' has fallen for another man,and seeks out for revenge,destroying so many lives around him.
Unrequited love is not a bad phenomenon.It can be as innocent as a child,but it can be a demon too.Noah accepted that Allie was with someone else,still he loved her and not go on an adventure of ruining their life.That was his unrequited selfless love.Scarlett ignored and overlooked everything in her love for Ashley,even when both she and him had married two different people.That was her unrequited selfish love.And when Kundan destroys everything when he learns the truth about Zoya,that was his unrequited obsessive love.
Unrequited love is like clay.It has the power to take any shape in which you mold it.It can be selfless,where you really do not expect anything.You've loved them with your heart and soul and it has been enough for you.Where you've came in terms with the fact that their heart can belong to someone else,and you're quite okay with it,as long as they're happy.But where unrequited love takes the shape of selfishness,possessiveness and obsession,it stops being love altogether.When you expect and force someone to be with you because it makes you happy,to love you because you love them,then you're not in love,you're in business,and you're not a lover-you're a trader.
Do not allow your love to be your weakness,especially your one-sided one,and feed your demons.If you really love them,love them selflessly without returns and creating problems for them.If not,be courageous enough to let them go,and find your happiness in something else.If you cannot be a person whom they love,do no go and become a person they hate.Live,laugh and love freely,as it is your right,but let them also live,laugh and love freely,as it is their right too.
"Loving someone who cannot love you the same way in return is not weakness.
It is one of the most courageous thing you'll ever do.You're putting your
armors at their feet and you're saying : 'I will not fight you in this.
I have loved you and that means I have already won."
-Anonymous
When 'Noah Calhoun' from 'The Notebook' quoted these words,he meant he was content in loving someone.He clearly excluded Allie's love from his 'enough'. And when he quoted these words,we all wondered,whether as readers or the movie audience for a second that how can he still love and miss Allie,whom he hasn't met in fourteen years,neither has he heard from her even after 365 letters,and most of all,whom he had seen with someone else.(He saw Allie and Lon in the city,remember ?)
Even though Noah and Allie were very much in love once,and even though Allie still thinks about Noah,she is clearly depicted to be in love with Lon and is happy marrying him,until she has a reunion with Noah.Noah,on the other hand is shown to be in love with her all through his life,searching her in every women he has dated,and therefore never marrying any of them.
Unrequited love is a phenomenon too common all around the world.And if there exist some other worlds,I am sure it is common in there too.You meet someone,have a small crush on them,and sometimes fall for them too.But that's not it.The real thing starts when you hope them to fall for you too. And when that doesn't happen,you rant and complain about love.Isn't it ? But isn't it also ironical when we fail to reciprocate someone's love when they love us,and never rant about it.When it's about our love,we want to be understood and reciprocated,but when it is someone else's,we ignore to understand and reciprocate.
'Gone with the wind', a 1939 classic,shows the different angles of unrequited love.Scarlett O' Hara, keeps on waiting and risking her every relation for Ashley Hikes,and thus never reciprocates her husband's Rhett Buttler's true love.But the day she realizes it,Rhett leaves her by saying "My dear,I don't give a damn." This dialogue symbolically indicates that no matter how strong unrequited love is,over time,and continuous futile attempts,gets frustrated and eventually dies.It shows that how a person who is waiting for someone,is also making someone wait.
Unrequited love is as much love as reciprocated love.You feel for them,and expect them to feel for you too.And just like it,it is painful too,but with more intensity.Unrequited love,like reciprocated love,doesn't validate and entertain your expectations or rights on the other person;means you're not entitled to expect or question.You cannot expect them to love you back,or tell you where were they,or with whom they had spent the day with.You cannot expect them to not to fall for someone else or stay with you forever.Your unrequited love is like your dream,personal and private,and when you try to force your dream on someone else,you're being selfish,because you deny to accept that they can have their own dreams,which probably doesn't include you.And accepting this,sometimes leads to dangerous consequences.
'Raanjhanaa' a 2013 movie,depicts how unrequited love becomes an obsession and leads to fatal and tragic ends.Dhanush acts as an obsessive lover,'Kundan' who fails to accept and move on even after knowing that his lady love 'Zoya' has fallen for another man,and seeks out for revenge,destroying so many lives around him.
Unrequited love is not a bad phenomenon.It can be as innocent as a child,but it can be a demon too.Noah accepted that Allie was with someone else,still he loved her and not go on an adventure of ruining their life.That was his unrequited selfless love.Scarlett ignored and overlooked everything in her love for Ashley,even when both she and him had married two different people.That was her unrequited selfish love.And when Kundan destroys everything when he learns the truth about Zoya,that was his unrequited obsessive love.
Unrequited love is like clay.It has the power to take any shape in which you mold it.It can be selfless,where you really do not expect anything.You've loved them with your heart and soul and it has been enough for you.Where you've came in terms with the fact that their heart can belong to someone else,and you're quite okay with it,as long as they're happy.But where unrequited love takes the shape of selfishness,possessiveness and obsession,it stops being love altogether.When you expect and force someone to be with you because it makes you happy,to love you because you love them,then you're not in love,you're in business,and you're not a lover-you're a trader.
Do not allow your love to be your weakness,especially your one-sided one,and feed your demons.If you really love them,love them selflessly without returns and creating problems for them.If not,be courageous enough to let them go,and find your happiness in something else.If you cannot be a person whom they love,do no go and become a person they hate.Live,laugh and love freely,as it is your right,but let them also live,laugh and love freely,as it is their right too.
"Loving someone who cannot love you the same way in return is not weakness.
It is one of the most courageous thing you'll ever do.You're putting your
armors at their feet and you're saying : 'I will not fight you in this.
I have loved you and that means I have already won."
-Anonymous
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